Don't Call Me Kit Kat by K.J. Farnham

This is not the sort of book I would usually go for but something about it spoke to me when browsing so I decided to purchase it.  I am so glad I did.

This is about so much more than eating disorders, it is a deeply insightful look at the experiences of teenagers throughout the "First World".  From the outside it all looks so easy doesn't it, we all have so much and yet, the one thing we often don't have is Control.  This novel is from a teenage girl's perspective but it could just as easily be a teenage boy that is in this situation.  Final year of middle school and on the cusp of that scary entity called High School and everything is changing.  Friends are seen less often as they make new relationships with other people that take the same class or are in the same after school activities.  Parents relationships may be under strain, have already broken down or one parent may simply have died - no matter which you feel abandoned.  As everything around you changes you start feeling isolated and like you don't fit in and would do anything to change that.

Don't Call Me Kit Kat is about just that, how far one lonely girl will go to making herself "fit in".  How she sees herself as less than others.  She doesn't push her friends away because they are not who she wants to be but because she sees herself as not worthy of their friendship.  Yes, Katie comes across as self absorbed and quite unpleasant at times and it is refreshing that the author does not shy away from the negative aspects of her personality.  Her propensity to blame others for her feeling "less than" is only normal and one I am sure many of us went through at this stage in life, especially once the hormones of puberty kick in.  Katie is a normal teenager who takes control of her life in the only way that makes her feel calm, feel able to cope and this is to binge and purge.

This is a book that all parents of teenagers should read, the frailty of the human psyche and the pressure upon teenagers to conform to what their friends want, what their school wants, what their parents want and what society as a whole displays as being worthy is laid bare.  It can be an uncomfortable read as you recognise aspects of your own parenting style and how easy it is to slip into a constant cycle of stick and no carrot.  It also reawakens those feelings of inadequacy at school.  Growing up we are told that school is the best years of our life and this book reminds us this is not the case for everyone and is likely not the case for most of them.

If you have a teenager make them read it too.  Maybe it will open that teenage bravado and armour up enough to start a dialogue with you about their life experiences and how they are coping.

There is no sensationalism here, it is a tale told straight down the line.  There is no prettying it up and making it seem glamorous as some articles and stories I have read seem to do.  It will grip you and force you to read to the end even as you feel the tears staining your cheeks.  I know I've made it sound "worthy" but it genuinely isn't - the tale comes above any attempt at that - it is simply a story told with realism and compassion.

**Review originally published December 17th, 2017**