Seven Will Out by JoAnn Spears

I seem to be going through a Tudor phase that is lasting several years and figured something "light and frothy" would be a nice change.  Whilst this is certainly that I'm not too sure how nice a change it was. 

Let me start by saying that one of the three stars given to this book is solely for the descriptions of the fashion of the time - from the wonderfully named Farthingale through to the undergown and exceedingly opulent overgown.  The clothing descriptions were sumptuous and never felt extraneous to the tale, they even managed to give a fairly realistic interpretation of the perils of dressing in Tudor times if you were of the nobility and had certain Courtly Standards to meet.

Unfortunately, this means that the story itself only gets two stars.  Here's why:

The modern day instance of our heroine (whose name I cannot remember but seeing as I finished the book 7 weeks ago it's to be expected) just had nothing going for her.  I really couldn't get my head around who she was supposed to be - yes, I get she was a History Professor but her polymath husband got in the way at every turn.  The ludicrous conceit of her doing the presentation in her academic gown with nothing underneath almost made me stop reading right then and there.  I was already becoming infuriated by every "close relative" being named after a Tudor and startlingly sharing their broadest personality traits as passed to us through historical documents (not entirely to be trusted but all we have).

Oh, was she called Kat?  I want to say she was called Kat - I could be wrong and I can't honestly be bothered checking the blurb to find out.

My second sticking point came with the Shakesperian stuff.

When the first revelation comes that some of Shakespeare's plays were written by this person of the Tudor Nobility I sort of went with it (I think the first one was Lady Jane Grey).  However, as the book progresses and more and more of the women take responsibility for writing some of the plays it began to really niggle with me.  Especially as in the timeline of the book some of these plays were gifted to Shakespeare to pass as his own after the death of Elizabeth I and yet they were reputedly played at court in front of her.  It also became extremely repetitive and boring with only the name of the play and the chosen quotes altering - virtually every interaction between our heroine and a new Tudor Noble Woman went the same way with "Oh, I wrote X of the Shakespeare Plays", "No, really.  Well I suppose that makes sense knowing what happened in your life" and then proceeding to use cherry picked quotes to prove the relevance of those plays to that persons life.

Honestly drove me round the twist and I was so glad when morning came and she had to return to real life - as unrealistic as her life actually is.

In fact, looking back on the 9th April when I completed this book I think 3 Stars is overly generous.  The distaste I can feel as I recall the events in the book makes me think 2 Stars would be much fairer - and that includes the 1 Star for the clothing!

Why Mummy Doesn't Give A ****! by Gill Sims

I wasn't really sure what to expect from this book as I have not read either of the previous 2 books in the trilogy.  to be honest, you definitely don't need to as this is truly a stand alone story that is really, a bit of a gem.  Of course you are thrown straight in to Ellen's world and just expected to know the major players in the tale.  However, the writing is such and the voice of the narrator so charming that you immediately "get it" and the tone genuinely feels like a good old chinwag with that friend you have known your whole life and you have a plethora of in jokes and key phrases that only mean something to the two of you.

I loved the whole moving in to her dream cottage and then finding out that the dream was damp and gloomy and not what it had looked like on the beautiful day she first saw it.  How relatable for anyone that has ever moved in to a new house; no matter how perfect it really is somehow your imagination makes it better whilst you wait for moving in day so it always feels a let down when you finally get there.  It seemed like the perfect metaphor for her separation and divorce and I am sure this was deliberate but it didn't mar my enjoyment.

The only glitch for me in the book was Ellen's seeming eagerness to get back out there and find someone.  Maybe if I'd read the first two books I would know what the gap is between the marriage breakdown and this move but it just seemed awfully fast and like she hadn't given herself time to fully lick her wounds.  Although, dating just to get away from two teenagers does seem like a plan.  Talking of which I really enjoyed the portrayal of her children in this book; they were living breathing anachronisms as all teenagers are and whilst you could feel the strong love between each family member you could also see all the tensions as they try and figure out who they are and what they want from their own lives.

To be honest a masterfully handled book that genuinely made me laugh.

Sofia Khan Is Not Obliged by Ayisha Malik

3.5 Stars

Sofia Khan is first and foremost a devout Muslim, well not quite so devout she wears a Niqab bur that step doesn't feel far away for her to be honest.  She faithfully follows the prayer schedule each day and avoids everything Haram - apart from the odd cigarette.  Sofia Khan is also British and is a fairly well adjusted mid 20-something with a career, friends and family.  Basically she is a 21st Century woman who just happens to be religious and have brown skin.

The book follows her from calling off her marriage, battling through her book PR job (that she has a love/hate relationship with) and just trying to cope with everything that life throws at her - including strangers calling her a terorist on the tube.  Whilst not laugh out loud funny, it is wryly humorous and gives a welcome account of modern life; whether or not you are a Muslim.  It was just unfortunate that the denoument of the novel was foreshadowed so heavily and came as no real surprise.  To be honest, I spent the last 20% of the book just wanting to get to the end as I knew exactly where it was going for Sofia and getting there was becoming boring.

Whilst the writing style is enjoyable with our eponymous narrator having an engaging voice and a wry sense of humour that translates well on the page.  My real issue with this book was repetition throughout - of dialogue, of situations - at first I did think it was to overstress a point for humorous purposes but if it is, it really misses the mark. The publisher's blurb promises you the "Muslim Bridget Jones" and this is definitely overselling the presented material, if not the premise.

I also had "issues" with Sofia refering to herself as an Hijabi and to devout Muslim men as "Beardies".  The reason that this became a problem for me was that if I were to use such terms I would be pilloried and after talking about the book with a mixture of my Muslim colleagues they also felt that the terms were insensitive and inappropriate and were surprised that the book was written by a Hijab wearing British Muslim woman.  Maybe it is a North/South divide thing but certainly the people I spoke to about found these terms offensive.

On the whole, it is a solid enough book that just doesn't quite deliver.

Anne Boleyn:500 Years Of Lies by Hayley Nolan

I don't know which annoyed me more the writing style or the way in which the research is presented as absolute and cannot be possibly argued with.  Even worse was the absolute denigration of Henry VIII, whilst he certainly became monstrous in his later years, particularly after the jousting accident, the assertions that he was a complete misogynistic monster do not tally with any other published research or even contemporaneous documents of the era.  He was a man of his time and place in the country and yes he would have been feted and his ego massaged shamelessly.  However the assertion that he treated his first Queen abominably from the outset does not jibe with anything else I have read, his treatment of her in later years speaks to the fact he was desperate for a son and she simply had not been able to provide a living heir and as King that was what he needed to do, secure the Tudor line.  According to this author though he was at the very least a power hungry sociopath who just discarded his first wife because it was convenient - nothing about the divorce or the separation from Rome was convenient but this is glossed over because unless Henry was a complete monster none of the rest book makes sense.

Even worse the portrayal of Anne Boleyn given makes her seem somewhere a weak, preyed upon female.  Apparently history tells us that she was a schemer, untrustworthy and more or less universally reviled.  This has never been my take on that Boleyn woman.  Yes she schemed, that's the nature of politics after all and as a potential, and actual, Queen she would have had to have a certain strength of character to succeed.  For an all to brief time she did succeed and then became Historically reviled because the victor writes the History books.  However, this decidedly feminist tract (for that is what it is) seeks to rewrite what is known and actually made Anne Boleyn seem like a thoroughly nasty piece of work who was also extremely gullible and allowed herself to be manipulated in to a position she could not get out of.  Why could she not have simply loved Henry and he her but by the very nature of all they had to go through to get wed driven them apart?  Why does the author seem to find that such a revolting prospect?

Maybe I am looking at the time period with too modern an eye.  After all, the grander the passion the more likely it is to burn bright and then simply fizzle out in a matter of weeks, months or after bitter acrimonious years.  Indeed, the very was Henry manipulated Anne in to the Tower and finally to death speaks, at least to me, of a great passion that died and then caused him much regret as he realised exactly the situation he was now in.  With all those voices whispering in the Kingly ear putting pressure on him to dispose of her in the most final of ways is his final action not understandable?

Beyond the skewing of History to fit a feminist brief there is the actual writing style.  I got so sick of having to read "As I will show later" only to find that no revelation of the sort was forthcoming.  Couple this with frequent dotting of hashtags through the book and a great deal of "junk language" this book is very hard to take seriously as having any historical worth.  I get that the author is trying to make the subject matter accessible and that historical texts can be rather dry to read but Seriously!

I managed to limp through to the end of this novel - and for me it did become a novel rather than a serious piece of research - primarily because of some of the accounts of daily life in Tudor times.

Honestly, one to be avoided as it is unashamedly agenda driven and this seems to be at the expense of Historical fact with the author's "interpretation" showing her biases.

The Birthday Party by Roisin Meaney

3.5 Stars

We've been to the idyllic Island of Roone several times now but I found it odd that I really didn't recognise many of the characters.  What should have felt like coming home actually felt like I was starting a whole new series but somewhere in the middle so all these characters that should have felt familiar to me were strangers.  It wasn't until Laura graced the pages that I started to get a handle on the whole thing again and even then it was tentative to say the least.

My biggest issue with the book was what on earth happened to Roone?

It used to be such a happy little island.  Sure people had real world problems but somehow there was always a sense of optimism surrounding them and you knew that no matter what tragedy befell them somehow their sheer pluck and vivacity would pull them through - Laura's bounceback from Breast Cancer, the great storm, etc..  This time it genuinely felt like a different, doomladen place.  Talk of suicides off the cliff edge, ostracism within the community, friendships dramatically going off the rails.

The only little glimmers of hope were the wonderful Italian gentleman (whose name I am struggling to remember how to spell so lets just refer to him as Walter).  He embodied the joie de vivre that the island used to have and has now lost.  His delight in the simple things was a real tonic and whenever we got to visit with him it lifted the whole book - even if we only ever got his tale second hand.  Everything else is just grim, including the eponymous Birthday Party.

Roisin Meaney certainly understands people though and although this novel kind of ruined the whole Roone ethos nobody acts in a way which is unbelievable.  Maybe that is the problem, it shows people at their worst and because the author is so good at people it makes it uncomfortable to read.  Whichever, I found that although I appreciated the vignettes it didn't make me happy and when I pick up a Roone book I expect some joy and there was little of that be found here.

Very Nearly Normal by Hannah Sunderland

          3.5 Stars

I could go in to great details about the plot of this book but, in an effort to keep it spoiler free I am just going to try and paint with broad brushstrokes.  Not an easy task as, despite the rather mediocre rating, I did find a lot of note in the book and did enjoy the story overall.  There were just little things that grated and made me put it down for 3 or 4 days to read something else before returning to it and that's never a good sign.

First off, we need to talk about Matilda Effie Heaton.  Our main narrator and the heroine, if she can be called such, of the novel.  Her initials may be "MEH" and she definitely thinks they describe her accurately but she is far from "MEH".  From the get go the reader understands that all is nowhere near rose tinted in her world, in fact she is perhaps the ultimate pessimist and I loved her nihilistic take on the world.  Nothing is ever right, except for that bottle of wine at night and even that regularly disappoints.  From the resentful keeping up with her former friend, her disastrous Tinder date and her glorious job (who doesn't want to work in a book store?) I was with her all the way.

Yes, she is unable to see anybodies else point of view.  Yes, she blames everyone around her for her loneliness and general dissatisfaction with her life.  No, she isn't unlikeable.  Even her alcoholism is kind of touching as her narration makes it clear how she slid slowly in to it and now doesn't know how to get back out from under the bottles toppling over her in a relentless waterfall.  Watching her grow throughout the book is enjoyable, if a little voyeuristic.

My real problems started with the introduction of Theo.  Whilst he is undoubtedly good for her in the short term you keep waiting for the other shoe to drop and when it does it is in so dramatic a fashion that I genuinely lost all respect for the book.  There is enough drama in Effie's life without having to really pile the misery on and I just couldn't get behind it once Theo's secret is revealed.  The major 180 that Effie does with her life also felt overdone, nobody changes that much no matter how hard they try.

As an aside the background love story with Arthur and Toby was warm and touching.  At first I wondered why all these little references kept creeping in but they turn out to be intrinsic to the plot.  Nicely woven in against the disaster zone that is Effie in the early portion of the book and give a nice bit of light relief when it all gets dark, gloomy and tearstained.

On the whole a solid enough book but one that took a great starting point and turned it needlessly melodramatic.

THIS IS AN HONEST AND UNBIASED REVIEW OF A FREE COPY OF THE BOOK RECEIVED FROM READERS FIRST.
       

Hammer To Fall by John Lawton

          2.5 Stars

On the whole I really struggled with this book and I wasn't expecting that at all.  I've read quite a few of the Frederick Troy novels and there is some world overlap with Joe Wilderness but it just didn't draw me in at all.  I was constantly aware that I was reading a book rather than being whisked away to the fictional world within it's pages and that is never a good thing.

Objectively, it is a rather old-fashioned tale of derring-do and the blurring of the lines necessary to function effectively when working in the field.  The tale itself is unrelentingly British and it managed to feel fresh but yet somehow dated (and by dated I mean 1950s spy tale).  Very strange amalgamation of scenarios, characters and even writing styles that ultimately kept this reader at arms length.

It doesn't help that Joe Wilderness is not the world's most likeable character.  Yes, he has the sort of compartmentalised personality that makes him ideal for the work he does but it did mean that I never felt I could trust him or even like him very much.  I found myself constantly second guessing why Joe did something and ultimately decided that I just didn't like him - his wife seemed to though.  Maybe the problem is that this is the third(?) Wilderness novel and maybe you have to read the others to truly appreciate the character (I haven't).

There is a lot of action in the book and it starts in the latter years of the Second World War in what was to become East Germany and basically sets up the relationship between Joe, Kostya, Nell and Erno.  It also explains the very lucrative Black Market scams that Joe, Ernie and Frank were running but somehow it all felt like Private Walker in Dad's Army (in actual fact, that is exactly how my mind's eye depicted Wilderness, particularly in his Walter disguise).

The story wanders about until we finally get to the point which is the Prague Spring.  This sees everyone gathered in Prague just as the Russians drive their tanks in to take over and, if I'm being entirely honest by the time we got there I was ready to drive a tank over the whole thing to make it go away.  The real highlight was Troy getting seconded to be British Ambassador in Prague and his wife forcing him to take it as she wanted the title.  Even better is Alice's escapade with the silver tray.  The rest of it just left me cold.

Not Mr Lawton's finest and I was heartily relieved to finish the book.

THIS IS AN HONEST AND UNBIASED REVIEW OF A FREE COPY OF THE BOOK RECEIVED VIA READERS FIRST.